lesson 5,3

Life and Happiness ............

Low levels of happiness and life satisfaction often arise when individuals continuously compare themselves to others.
Such comparisons can generate stress from not possessing what others have—whether it concerns material possessions such as cars and housing, social recognition as “likes” on social media, or participation in desirable social activities
  • Generous individuals tend to report higher levels of happiness than those who are self-centered.
  • Excess free time combined with insufficient purposeful activity can undermine perceived quality of life.
  • Parents with a positive disposition are more likely to raise happier children.
  • Social engagement and close  relationships with colleques and friends are strong predictors of happiness.
  • Sharing a good meal with pleasant company can enhance subjective well-being.
  • Happiness is not a “lottery,” but rather the result of specific behaviour’s and circumstances

What Consumer psychology research indicates:

Secret: 5

Two Basic Questions

  • Which goals do you spend
    most of your energy,
    trying to achieve in your life?

  • What truly matters most to you in life?

Happiness is doing to others what you would like others to do to you.

How Strong Is Your quality of life?

From our experience, leadership can be seen as “the realisation of a view of humanity.” By this, we mean showing the clear connection between our unconscious core values and our concrete, practical behaviour in daily life. In this way, ethics becomes the act of making the unconscious conscious – and taking responsibility for it.
To discover your own core values, you can start with the two basic questions on the top. 
Asking yourself these questions may reveal that you spend the least time on what is most important to you – and the most time on things that are the foundation of your life quality.
To explore this further, you can compare it with the Holmes-Rahe stress scale.- It was developed in the late 1960s by psychiatrists Thomas Holmes and Richard Rahe, who statistically analysed the link between major life events and subsequent illness. They created the Social Readjustment Rating Scale (SRRS), which assigns “Life Change Units” – which helped me personally to a realistic and alarming self-realization in the middle of a divorce process, some years ago. The model ranks 30 major life events by stress level that you have experienced, or been exposed to in the last 12 months. – The points you collect tells about the efforts you have used – or gained, during this year. Both good and bad events are valued. 
However, SGL experience is that 150 points or less is normal. / 150-300 points is worrying and over 300 points is so risky that we recommends you to talk with your doctor.

  • 15 stress factors (729 points) relate to family and private life.
    6 stress factors (213 points) relate to what we call economy/friends/leisure.
    9 stress factors (308 points) are connected to work and change situations.

30 topics for life and health

   Life Event Stress Scale

  1. Death of a spouse – 100 points
  2. Divorce – 73 points
  3. Separation from partner – 65 points
  4. Imprisonment or institutional stay – 63 points
  5. Death of a close family member – 63 points
  6. Serious injury or illness – 53 points
  7. Marriage – 50 points
  8. Job loss – 47 points
  9. Marital reconciliation – 45 points
  10. Retirement – 45 points
  11. Major health change in the family – 44 points
  12. Pregnancy – 40 points
  13. Sexual difficulties – 39 points
  14. New family member – 39 points
  15. Major change in work responsibilities – 38 points
  16. Major change in finances – 38 points
  17. Death of a close friend – 37 points
  18. Change of job or relocation – 36 points
  19. Major change in relationship with spouse – 35 points
  20. Taking on a large loan – 31 points
  21. Foreclosure or repossession – 30 points
  22. Promotion – 29 points
  23. Child leaving home – 29 points
  24. Family problems – 29 points
  25. Outstanding personal success – 28 points
  26. Spouse leaving the workforce – 26 points
  27. Completion of education – 26 points
  28. Building or buying a home – 25 points
  29. Change in personal habits – 24 points
  30. Conflicts with boss – 23 points

Note your current topics and your points here. Sum up and feel the result.

Here are some of the symptoms:
Physical symptoms:

  • Heart palpitations with irregular rhythm
    Shallow and faster breathing
    Headaches
    Poor digestion
    Feeling of a lump in the throat
    Frequent colds
    Low sex drive
    Shaking or trembling in the fingers
    Increased sweating
    Dizziness

Over time, these can lead to illnesses such as:

  • Stomach ulcers / heart problems
    Asthma / skin disorders
    Neck / back problems
    Migraine / epilepsy

  • Psychological symptoms:

  • Irritability
    Poor memory
    Restlessness
    Aggressiveness

Home Lesson 5,3

An old saying goes: “You know others by yourself.” – This is also true with regard to sensitive questions that balance between the Professional and the Private.
Therefore, test out the topics and questions on yourself before you bring them up in a coaching or performance appraisal.
Do your homework – and be prepared for the difficult but important conversation.

NEXT / Secrets: 6-10
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