What we write on Facebook, and everywhere else, leaves traces that tell who we are. With the help of “big data” — the gathering of everything from our “likes” to the “words” we use — profiles are drawn that sort us into large groups. Roughly, those can be divided into four psychological families according to Carl Gustav Jung, then into 8 sub-families, and further into the 16 personality types of the well-known Meyer Briggs personality tests. What is striking is that the Facebook tests on offer manage with a few hundred “likes” to describe your personality quite accurately. I have tried several of them, and have been just as impressed and astonished every time. My friend, for one, was given the characterisation: “Your personality is facinating”
The reactions
It all begins with the “words” we either use ourselves, or endorse with a “like”. If you know the formulas it is easy to “assume” both the temperament and the personal profile of an active Facebook user. I think that is entirely OK, because we are what we are. It is then only a matter of becoming conscious of the phenomenon, and of taking responsibility for our “words”.
Communication is conveying, on every channel, what you want to tell. Personally I like to put colour on the different “frequencies” — the “channels”, or the “languages” if you like — with blue, red, yellow and purple. Following the SGL methodology, everything we say can be coloured in one of them, and the colour in turn decides what the receiver perceives. We distinguish here between:
- Head language (blue), which is rational, analytical, measurable and fact-oriented.
- Heart language (red), which is “person-to-person” oriented, to create the safety it takes to be understood the way you meant.
- Gut language (yellow), which has to be felt as value-oriented and genuine, to create the emotional atmosphere it takes. Expressions like “a good gut feeling” and “a bad gut feeling” say everything about whether the message is received or not.
- Body language (purple), which is perceived in pictures, and conveyed through design, layout, photographs and personal impressions. The “code” creates an image either way — and an image tells more than 1000 words. Just think of the recipes on Facebook, where a beautiful design and a lovely photograph say a great deal before we begin to read.
The results
The language we use says who we are. My experience is that if we want to convey something important, sender and receiver have to start on the same frequency. Then the message has to be founded and presented rationally. Then you have to create interest and engagement in the receiver, by speaking personally to his or her own experience. Finally you have to own your message and be it, in a way that creates trust and a good gut feeling, so that you reach what you want. And if you manage at the same time to paint the message in pictures of words, you are a gifted communicator.
I will just say: good luck — and check your own traces. / jph
Read on in SGL